A Very Special Cameos Christmas
by DragonRaiderX9
Summary: Vaati is out to ruin Christmas, and it's up to the Link and the Cameos of Time to stop him. Will they succeed? And how long will it be until Santa makes an appearance?


Merry Christmas faithful Cameos fans! I've never done a Christmas story based off one of my other stories, but I think Cameos has grown popular enough to warrant it.

For those of you that haven't read Cameos of Time, the idea is that most of the main characters are replaced by people from other games, movies, books, etc.

Floating Skull: Floating Skull cannot abide the Yule time holidays! These feelings of warmth and good cheer cause mortal agony to Floating Skull!

Beast Boy: Chill out, dude! Ghetto Felix found a charm that will block the feelings from you.

Flt. Sk.: Is the puny green changling telling the truth? Can Floating Skull survive the Winter holidays?

Ghetto Felix: Green kizzle's bein' nizzled 'bout kokizzle!

B.B.: He says yes.

Ignoring my muses, I hope you all enjoy. I warn you now, this story is spawned from my twisted mind, so some parts might be disturbing. Also, this story will not fit in with the timeline of Cameos of Time. It's like those DBZ movies. They happen, but if you watch the anime, you realize that most of the movies couldn't possibly have happened. We just all get over it and enjoy them.

Anyway, enjoy!

_Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!!_

-

**The Legend of Zelda: Cameos of Time  
A Very Special Cameos Christmas**

**Presented by  
DragonRaiderX9**

**Kakariko Village**

It was Christmas Eve, and Link was staying at Impa's house. He was sitting at the table while Navi sat on his head. To his left, Ivan was sitting calmly going over the storyline of Ocarina of Time so as to avoid any more surprises. Across from him sat Edward Elric, replacement for the Magic Bean Seller. Jet Enduro, the new Sage of Shadow, was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. Ed's brother Alphonse, the Cucco Lady's replacement, was making tea.

"Ya know," started Link. "I'm glad the author let us take a break from the fanfiction to celebrate the holidays, but…couldn't we have gone home?"

"Unfortunately, no…" replied Ivan, looking up from his reading. "With this many people to cover, someone's bound to try hiding out in the real world so they don't have to come back. That keeps the story from moving along until he or she is found and brought back."

"That still sucks though," said Ed. "It would be nice to spend with Winri and her grandma."

"But Brother…" interjected Al, sitting down with the pot of tea. "Back in our own world, we're not in our world. We couldn't spend it with Winri anyway."

"Someone want to fill me in?" asked Link.

"Winri's a childhood friend of ours," explained Al.

"No, not that! The world thing."

"Oh, that," said Ed lazily. "It's complicated and I don't want to bore you with details. Long story short, we're stuck in an alternate world trying to find our way home."

"There was a gate open at one point," continued Al. "But its existence was too big a threat to both worlds."

Jet walked over to the table, poured himself a cup of tea, then leaned back against the wall. "So, when are the other sages getting here?" he asked after taking a sip. As if to answer his question, the door burst open and stumbling in came Peter Griffin, Sage of Fire.

"Hey, everys-body," sputtered Peter. "Ams I too late for the party?"

"Looks like somebody hit the eggnog pretty early this year," muttered Navi. Link snickered quietly, whilst Peter collapsed on Jet's bed.

"If he vomits, he dies," said Jet quietly. As he finished, the group heard the unmistakable sound of a person regurgitating his food. "Alright, he was warned." Jet cocked his ARM, and proceeded to point it at Peter's semi-conscious form.

While the others tried to pry the ARM out of Jet's hand, a loud pop was heard as an aged man appeared in the middle of the room.

"Hey, Dumbledore!" called Link. "A little help?"

Albus Dumbledore, Sage of Light, sighed and drew his wand. Pointing it at Jet's outstretched hand, he cried, "_Accio ARM!_" Jet's ARM flew out of his hand and was caught by Dumbledore. "Perhaps we can save the violence for after Christmas."

Jet grumbled to himself. "You plan on helping me clean the vomit off my bed."

"Well, since you asked so nicely." Dumbledore pointed his wand once more, and was about to cry a spell when a shriek tore through the night. Alarmed, the group raced towards the door.

"Oh, great," muttered Link once they were outside. "It's Vaati!"

Indeed, the one-eyed wind sorcerer was floating in the middle of the village, with Kairi, Sage of Water, in the grip of his shadowy tentacle. Floating several feet away was Starfire, Sage of Forest. Her hands and eyes glowed a bright green. She tossed two star bolts towards Vaati, who blew them away with a tornado. Next, she tried firing her eye lasers at him, but Vaati quickly dodged upward, then charged forward. Before Starfire could react, Vaati tackled her and knocked her to the ground. Vaati then wrapped a tentacle around her unconscious form.

"Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!" laughed Vaati. "It's time that Vaati got his Christmas wish. Girls, girls, and more girls! And I shall start with these two lovely ladies!"

Swearing loudly, Jet raised his ARM as Link readied his bow. "Stop!" shouted Dumbledore. "You might hit one of the girls!" Jet hesitated, then lowered his ARM. Vaati laughed before taking flight and heading north beyond Death Mountain.

"We have to follow them!" exclaimed Ivan. "We can't let Vaati get away with this, at Christmas of all times!"

"Yeah, here's the problem," replied Link. "Vaati flew north, towards Frozen Hyrule."

"Back up a sec," demanded Jet. "I played Ocarina of Time once out of boredom, and I never saw a place called Frozen Hyrule."

"Yeah, what gives?" added Ed.

"It was a fanfiction awhile back," answered Link. "Someone created the concept of a frozen ice cap to the north of the castle. Obviously the name was taken from Four Swords Adventures."

"I don't know why that area would appear in this fanfiction," said Ivan. "But if Vaati's heading north, that must be where his lair is."

"But how will we find his lair in the middle of an ice cap?" asked Al.

"Maybe I can help," said a voice. The group looked down the stairs to see a figure clad in high-tech battle armor. "My scanners will be able to pierce the snow and ice."

"Samus Aran!" exclaimed Link. "I haven't seen you since Super Smash Bros. Melee!"

"Link…," replied Samus coldly.

"Well, let's not dilly-dally here!" said Ed. "Let's get going!"

"Perhaps I should stay here," suggested Dumbledore. "I have to make sure our Fire Sage doesn't get into anymore trouble." He opened the door to the house to reveal that Peter had gotten into a wrestling match with the cage in the corner, and was losing horrendously.

"Good point," agreed Link. "Come on guys, let's go!"

**Frozen Hyrule**

"I'm picking up a massive heat signature about five miles ahead," announced Samus.

"Alright everyone, get ready for the long haul," said Link. The others just groaned.

"That wasn't really necessary, you're just making the others feel bad," replied Samus. She turned and began walking towards their destination.

"So what's up with you two?" asked Ivan to Link a few minutes later. "She doesn't seem to like you very much."

"Long story," replied Link. "Here's the short version, we dated about five or six years ago, but we broke up for various reasons." Link gave Ivan a look that clearly said not to ask questions. "And it's been like this ever since."

Ivan sighed. "This is why famous people shouldn't date. They can never keep it together. Too much publicity."

"So that's why you're single," added Navi, who had been surprisingly silent up until now. "I always figured it was because you annoy girls too much." Ivan glared at Navi, but opted not to respond.

"So Jet, what's your story?" asked Ed.

"What's to say? I'm from Wild ARMs 3, in which I'm some artificial life-form or something," answered Jet lazily.

"What about that gun you carry?" inquired Al.

"What, this? This is my Airget-lamh B/V2." Jet held it up for all to see. "It's an ARM, or Artifact of Ruins' Memories."

"Cryptic," replied Ed. "So what's the difference between that and a normal gun?"

"Not sure. But hey, as long as I can shoot things!" To illustrate his point, Jet unloaded a quick round on a nearby glacier.

"We're here," announced Samus.

"Let's do this!" cried Link.

**Vaati's Palace**

Link and the team began a long, yet thoroughly uninteresting trek through the castle. Link showed off his masterful sword techniques, while Ivan used Wind Psynergy to defeat his enemies. Ed and Al used their alchemic reactions to entrap and incapacitate the foes. Jet and Samus competed in a leisurely contest of marksmanship.

After two hours of searching and puzzle solving, the team found their way to Vaati's throne room. On a table in the center of the room lay the unconscious forms of Kairi and Starfire. Vaati hovered just above them.

"What are you impudent people doing here?!" demanded Vaati. "I was just ready to have some alone time with the lovely ladies!"

"It's been several hours and you're just now getting started?" accused Samus. "What have you been doing up until now?"

"Not that it's any of your business," replied Vaati haughtily. "But I've been sprucing up. I want to look my best for my girls."

Resisting the urge to vomit, Link and co. quickly spread out and surrounded Vaati. Jet shot a barrage of bullets from his ARM, which were easily deflected. Link, Samus, and Al charged forward, only to be blown back by the powerful gales. Ed used an alchemic reaction. A hill of marble rose out of the floor and wrapped around Vaati's lower half, but within seconds, he had broken free. Ivan fired a Sonic Slash, but though it could penetrate the winds, Vaati could easily dodge.

"It's no good!" cried Al. "He beats back everything we throw at him!"

"Did you think it would be that easy, you insects?" sneered Vaati.

"For a second there," replied Ed. "Yeah, I kinda did."

"We're doing this the wrong way!" concluded Link. "Samus, can you shoot him?"

"Maybe if he's not looking at me, but…"

Link turned to Jet. "How fast can you run?"

Jet snorted. "Fast enough."

"Good, prepare a charge shot. Alphonse, I want you to carry me towards Vaati. The rest of you, follow our lead!"

Alphonse grabbed Link and rushed forward. Because of Al's weight, the winds had little effect on them. As they neared the target, Al lifted Link as high as he could so Link could slash at Vaati. Vaati dodged upward, right into Ivan's Sonic Slash. Dazed, Vaati's winds ground to a halt, allowing Samus to hit him square on. Vaati was hurt by this point, but he regained focus and began another tornado, only to have the floor encase him again via Edward's alchemy.

"You think this will stop me!?" screeched Vaati. "I need but two seconds to escape!"

"Too bad!" cried Jet. "Because I only need half a second. Accelerator!"

In a flash, Jet disappeared and reappeared in midair above Vaati. He swung his outstretched leg downward with such force as to free Vaati from his bindings and hit the floor. When Vaati opened his eyes, he saw a sword, a staff, a plasma gun, an ARM, and two sets of fists pointing at him.

"Now, what shall we do with him?" asked Ivan sinisterly.

"Mercy!" cried Vaati. "Please! Have mercy!"

Link was outraged. "Give me one good reason as to why you deserve any mercy!"

"Because it's Christmas," came a voice from the door. Everyone looked over to see none other than…

"Santa Claus!" exclaimed Al.

"Come on," muttered Link. "Am I the only one who saw that coming?"

"Vaati has indeed been a naughty wind mage," continued Santa. "But Christmas is about forgiveness and harmony. Just this once, friends and foes alike can relax and share a glass of eggnog." Santa walked over to the two girls and sprinkled some magic dust on them. Within seconds, their eyes opened and they returned to consciousness.

"Wha…what happened?" muttered Kairi, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

Starfire yawned loudly. "I feel as if I've been hit by a Tameranian Gleebleglorber."

"And as for you, Vaati," said Santa.

"Yes, Santa?" asked Vaati nervously.

"You shall have your wish granted." Santa spread more dust over Vaati. Vaati vision was overcome by darkness.

**Somewhere in the south Pacific**

Vaati's eye cleared and he found himself on a tropical island. Upon noticing the nearby sign, he shouted with glee.

"I've been searching for this place all my life," said Vaati. "But I'm finally here! Cheap Hooker Island!" He floated as fast as he could towards the registration desk.

"Yes, we'll need to see some ID," said the receptionist. Vaati pulled out his Driver's Liscense. "Well, this seems to be in order, I just need to see your credit card."

"Of course," agreed Vaati. "I have mine right here." He showed it to the receptionist.

"I'm terribly sorry," replied the receptionist. "We don't take American Express."

"_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"_

**Kakariko Village  
(Christmas Day)**

Through some amazing effort, Link and co. had gotten back in enough time to finish setting up the party. In was a huge success! All the Cameos, friends and enemies alike, joined in the festivities. Alphonse spent much of the time arm-wrestling with Zero. Edward used his alchemy to entertain the many children. Jet and Sephiroth were fixed at the bar, engaging in a drinking contest. Starfire handed out gifts and when she was finished, she danced until she couldn't dance anymore. Kairi regaled anyone who would listen with tales of her adventures with Sora and Riku. And Dumbledore used his magic to cure anyone who was extremely drunk. Peter Griffin was treated fifteen times during the day.

As the day drew to a close, Link and Samus stood outside Impa's doorway. "You know, Samus, you really came through for us today. I'd even say you saved Christmas."

"Thanks," replied Samus. "It's times like this that I remember that you're not a complete jerk."

"Hey," said Link, looking up. "Isn't that mistletoe?"

_Zap!!!_

"No," said Samus as the fried remains of mistletoe showered the two. "It isn't."

**The End**

Link: Hello everyone! We at the cast of Cameos of Time would like to wish you a Merry Christmas!

Navi: Happy Hanukkah!

Ivan: Whatever it is you say for Kwanzaa.

Link: And any other holiday we might have missed. Remember, our story is still going on right now, so be sure to read The Legend of Zelda: Cameos of Time if you haven't already.

Flt. Sk.: Because if you don't! Floating Skull will devour your soul!

_Floating Skuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuull!!!_


End file.
